We sit down with psychologist Kerry Athanasiadis to learn more about her group for young women and self-esteem.

Hi Kerry, you recently started a group called Embrace Yourself that aims to increase self-acceptance and self-compassion. Can you tell me a bit about the group and what it involves?

Yes, the group runs over 6 weeks for an hour and a half and is particularly designed for young women aged between 18-30. The sessions aim to teach skills for bringing a greater sense of compassion and acceptance to oneself.

The group draws on a range of different evidence-based therapeutic interventions, including Cognitive Behavioural interventions (CBT), Compassion-Focused interventions (CFT) and Mindful Self-Compassion interventions (MSC). It includes a mix of instructive teaching, practical exercises, guided meditations, imagery and small group discussion.

The group aims to help young women understand and familiarise themselves better with their inner critical voice and how it functions. There are a range of topics covered, for example: understanding our stress response and learing adaptive ways of coping; how emotions work and various ways to regulate them; responding to our inner critic in a more helpful way and reducing self-judgment; establishing healthy boundaries and connecting authentically with others; how to cultivate self-care and self-compassion – physically, mentally, and emotionally.

Who would benefit most from this group?

I think everyone could benefit from learning how to bring greater acceptance and compassion to themselves, but the group may be particularly useful for young women who experience high shame or self-criticism, perfectionism, anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, or difficulty with self-acceptance.

What has been the inspiration for creating this group?

I have been working with young people for quite a few years in various settings and one of the things I have observed over the years is how harsh young women can be towards themselves. This highlighted the need for greater self-kindness and self-compassion in this client population. I also noticed that there weren’t many groups for young women of this nature so it inspired me to develop this group.

Our culture tends to place a lot of pressure on young women to look and act a certain way and this can often be internalised, resulting in stress when women perceive themselves to be falling short of those external expectations and pressures.

I have also noticed how often young women report feeling disconnected from other young women and this sense of isolation leads to withdrawal, further exacerbating their stress and alienating them from each other. Group therapy can therefore foster a greater sense of connection by normalising our experiences and reflecting on our common humanity.

You are a woman yourself and I am sure you can readily remember the struggles that young women go through when dealing with issues like body image, self-esteem and peer pressure. What snippets of wisdom have you picked up along your personal journey?

I have learned that it takes a lot of courage to be yourself and to embrace your imperfections. I have learned that when we give ourselves permission to be ourselves, it gives other people permission to do the same and therefore fosters an authentic connection.

I am a recovering perfectionist myself and over the years I have learned that showing up and being myself is enough. My clients like to be able to relate to me as a human being, and it can be helpful for them to see that just because I am a psychologist, it does not make me immune to the human condition. This is our common humanity. I therefore find that forming an authentic therapeutic relationship with my clients is the greatest healer of all, beyond any other strategy or technique.

One of my favourite teachings comes from the pioneer of Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT), Marsha Linehan. She  says that to change ourselves, we first have to accept ourselves. I like this because it encourages acceptance, which naturally then leads to change. I like to try to bring unconditional acceptance to myself and to my clients in my counselling room, because it is only then that we can take the struggle out and create change.

And lastly, what are your personal self-care strategies that help you recharge and look after your physical and mental health?

I have a few self-care habits in my life that help me to replenish, restore and stay grounded. I like variety, so I try to engage in a range of different self-care activities. Most recently, I have been going for a morning walk every day, which sets the tone for my day and helps me clear my mind. I also find that a connection with nature and the outdoors is incredibly beneficial for my general health and wellbeing. I also attend a weekly yoga class, which I find incredibly restorative and beneficial, or an occasional Zumba class, which is so much fun!

I find that engaging in something creative can be beneficial in slowing down the mind, so I paint, draw or craft in my spare time. Finally, I also like to spend as much time with my family and friends as I can.