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Managing the Mental Load in Motherhood

Photo from behind of a mother embracing a child and looking up toward the sky.

By Kerry Athanasiadis

May 24, 2024

Motherhood is a beautiful journey, but it comes with an invisible weight which is sometimes referred to as the 'Mental Load’.

From sleepless nights to endless to-do lists, mums often carry the mental load of their families, usually at the cost of their own mental health. 

Here are some strategies to help you with managing the mental load:

  1. Prioritize and Delegate:

Identify what tasks are essential and which ones can be delegated to others, like your partner, extended family members, friends or community. Don't hesitate to ask for help. It truly takes a village to raise children.

  1. Create a Routine:

Establishing a daily routine can provide structure and reduce the mental effort required to plan each day. Predictability can ease the mental load. Try using a daily routine and task whiteboard on the fridge that everyone has access to.

  1. Use Technology:

Utilise apps and digital tools for scheduling and organising tasks. Set reminders for appointments, grocery lists, and important dates.

  1. Self-Care:

Make self-care a priority. Schedule regular breaks, even if they're short, to recharge. This can help you better manage stress. Things like taking a short walk, practicing some yoga or meditation, taking a bath or reading a book.

  1. Communicate Openly:

Share your feelings and concerns with your partner, friends, or a therapist. Sometimes, talking about the mental load can provide relief and solutions.

  1. Set Realistic Expectations:

Understand that you can't do everything perfectly. Accept that some tasks may need to wait, and that's okay.

  1. Simplify and Declutter:

Reduce physical and mental clutter in your home. A tidy environment can lead to a clearer mind.

  1. Support Network:

Build a support network of fellow mums who can relate to your experiences. They can offer advice, empathy, and a listening ear.

  1. Time Management:

Use time management techniques like the Pomodoro Technique to prioritise tasks efficiently.

  1. Self-compassion:

Be kind to yourself. Understand that it's normal to feel overwhelmed at times. Don't judge yourself for needing help or taking a break.

Remember, managing the mental load is an ongoing process. It's about finding strategies that work for you and adapting as your family's needs change. It’s okay to ask for help and prioritise your wellbeing! 

If you are struggling with managing the mental load and need some additional support with this, our therapists can assist you with a more tailored plan and strategies.

Contact us to discuss your individual support needs and book in with one of our psychologists.

Kerry Athanasiadis

Kerry Athanasiadis is a psychologist and group facilitator. She works independently in private practice and has a special interest in working with young people.